Bird Brain

I got hit on the back of the head by a bird today.

Seriously, a bird FLEW INTO THE BACK OF MY HEAD. People that know me well (and others I've scared off by sharing this information) know that I have a very rational fear of birds. I can't really explain it - I've never seen the Hitchcock movie, I eat chicken, and I watched March of the Penguins without having heart palpitations. I do, however, cross the street when I see a bird in my path, shush people when they make bird noises, and refuse to buy clothes that have birds on them.

Friends continue to tell me that I'm mad - that birds are more afraid of me than I am of them. I try to tell them that they're wrong, but they don't listen. They're always telling me that there's no way a bird would fly so close to actually touch me, but guess what, friends? YOU WERE WRONG.

My heart rate has since calmed and I've regained normal breathing patterns since the 'incident,' but I don't think I'll ever stop talking about this. I'll continue to complain that birds are evil and should be exterminated, and will roll my eyes when friends try to explain what happened as "bird revenge."

So note, Internet, the feathered are not your friends. Be safe.