Aswan, you little minx

Here I am, Internet! I've gotten a number of requests in the past few days to put up a new post, but the creative juices just aren't flowing. Most probable reason: THEY WERE EVAPORATED BY THE 50 DEGREE CELSIUS WEATHER I WAS IN LAST WEEK. In the shade. No, seriously. Feel my pain, Internet.

Work chewed me up and spit me out in Upper Egypt for five days last week, and let's just say, I'd never been more excited to return to Cairo than I was on Thursday. Don't get me wrong - the Nile is really pretty down (up?) there and housekeeping leaves you fun towel creatures like these on your bed after they clean (clean?) your room, but still.

While trying to tame my freshly cut bangs that seemed to want to assume every position other than 'flat against head' and regulate my heartbeat for the two and a half hour car ride while sitting next to baby quails (!), I had a number of, well, interesting, conversations. Behold:

Me (to waiter): Umm, do you serve fish here?
Workshop Participant (to me, not giving the waiter a chance to respond): You don't eat meat?
Me: No, I don't actually.
Workshop Participant: What about liver?

Me (hotel room, 1 am, just finished a day of field work, on the phone with hotel reception): Umm, someone took the batteries out of my AC remote. Can you please bring some up.
Hotel Reception Guy (1:15 am, my room, after opening up the back of the remote, seeing no batteries, but then pressing every single button on the remote): O yes, this isn't working. *Opens room next door and takes the batteries out of their remote.

Driver (after asking me to plug my iPod into his car radio): This guy is really good! Who is he?
Me: Usher.
Driver: Usher. Ah, kwayis dah (Yes, he's good).

Me (hotel room, 5 pm, just finished a day of field work, on the phone with hotel reception): Umm, the shower's leaking.
Hotel Reception Guy (5:20 pm): Ma howa shaghaal aho (It seems to be working).
Me: Yes, I know it's working. It won't stop dripping.
Hotel Reception Guy: Yes, but it's working. Do you want more water pressure? Do you want me to turn the water heater on? Do you need more towels?
Me: Umm, no to all of those. How about you try to turn it off.
Hotel Reception Guy (tries to turn off shower): Oh.

And then there was this guy who I saw "swimming" in the pool on my last day. Thought he was dead for a few seconds until I saw him floundering around. Might have been weighed down by his beard.

And the best news? I'm going back tomorrow.

Also, this is my 200th post. You'd think someone would have had a cupcake ready or something.