Recap

I'm a whiner (not to be confused with 'winner,' of which I also am, but that's neither here nor there). Roonies has earned the righteous title of Master Complainer, but I think I've got whining down. It's hard to notice under my cute and cuddly facade, and I try to bat my non-existent but Lancome-slathered eyelashes to distract from how annoying I really may be at any given moment, but I generally feel the need to comment, sometimes negatively, on situations I find myself in (see: this blog). So, with that cleared up, let's address this mystery illness I've been the not-so-silent victim of one last (ha!) time.

Things that have gone into my mouth (minus a 'that's what she said' joke) from Monday, May 25th to Monday, June 1st:

• 3 bowls of cereal
• 2 spoons of fava beans
• 1/2 bowl of plain pasta
• 2 spoons of plain rice
• 4 pieces of brown toast
• 1 banana
• 3 bottles of Gatorade in colors not found in nature
  
• 1/2 boiled potato
• 1 bowl of corn soup

Things that have come back up and out of my mouth since Monday, May 25th:

• 1 bowl of corn soup

Number of unexpected days taken off work: 3

Total weight loss: 4 kilos

General feeling: Worse than when I had salmonella (o yes, folks, this body is the gift that keeps giving)

Estimated time required to pass before I can handle a similar illness: The next time someone at work suggests ordering (the good) sausage sandwiches.*

*Note, my illness was not the result of (the good) sausage sandwich eating. However, the precarious nature of my stomach is dissuading me from eating anything that hasn't been sterilized. I have no will power, though, and will crumble at the mere suggestion of Manousha. Coworkers, if I've ever wanted you to read this blog (which I never have), NOW IS THE TIME.